23 March 2020, 12:41 pm - In Which I Get Married

This is my first journal entry for my apocalypse journal, Connection in Isolation. The main theme of this blog-journal will be relationships in the time of a pandemic. Just a heads up, the dates in the title tend to be mismatched from the publish date due to the fact that I often write the posts on my phone or on a Word document, then I copy them over and publish.

Some background information about me, my location, and the past two weeks. My name is Lora Kirmer, I am 26 years old, and I live in Emporia, Kansas. On March 9, 2020, I began my last comprehensive exam for my master’s degree in Communication Studies at Kansas State University. It was about small group theory, and looking back, it is quite ironic that I wrote about the importance of groups and socializing as the nation began to discourage any form of physical group meetings. As the week progressed, my community became socially isolated and we all retreated to our own small groups, then to our own dyads, avoiding any place that calls for large amounts of people at any given time. Since we’re social creatures by nature, we adapted our needs for social groupings to online areas, gathering on Facebook, Twitter, and other social media sites.  The communication scholar in me is thrilled to witness all of the communication theory being put into practice, and I can’t wait to see what research comes out of our ability to cope with social distancing and still communicate. In 1918, we couldn’t do this.

Anyway, back to my timeline. By March 13, a Friday, I finished my exam and visited my favorite coffee shop one last time. My fiancé discouraged this. You see, I don’t have health insurance, and we are supported by his income only. We literally cannot afford for me to get sick. He works at the local university, and started working from home before the official order came out to do so. We spent March 14-19 stocking up on necessities (luckily we already had most essentials before people began panic buying), and debating on what we should do re: insurance. The Kansas courthouses closed and were not issuing marriage licenses. We made a secret trip to a courthouse in Colorado (my hometown, to be specific) and eloped. What an American thing to do – marrying for insurance! We stopped for gas once, and only interacted with the courthouse personnel. It felt very illicit. Aside from this blog and my family, we have not told anyone about our marriage. It was not what we planned, and it was made especially difficult because my family could not be present due to their own health complications that put them as “at-risk,” but it was necessary.

So, now, I am documenting my feelings while I stay isolated in our home. Well, not totally isolated. We have three cats who think this is the best time ever. I disagree, because they will not leave me alone at all. Also, I think it will create some attachment issues when life returns to “normal.”